yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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