You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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