i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
