Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
