kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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