Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize