He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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