Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request

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(636): View more from Missouri

Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.

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(415): View more from California

I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there

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(432): View more from Texas

My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear

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(914): View more from New York

Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.

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(909): View more from California

i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on

(901): View more from Tennessee

continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way

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(618): View more from Illinois

As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument

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