Taylor Swift is so right about you.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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