I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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