Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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