it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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