Pregnant stripper...not hot.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize