there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize