The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Semen is not good for contacts.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
