Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
