she looked like the bat from fern gully.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
