Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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