Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I just saw a hot homeless man
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize