Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
How does one acquire holy water?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
