hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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