some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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