Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
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