I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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