Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
