So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
