She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
