Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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