YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
