"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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