ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
