The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
