Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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