The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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