dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Randomize
