She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize