do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
