Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
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Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize