do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
