I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
