Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
