in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
