I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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