i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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