I think i peed on brittanys purse
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
What happened to fro yo and sex?