New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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