3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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