if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I need a beard to bite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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