Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
