He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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